stuck stuck stuck,
i cannot think of anything to write about any more. is this what they call writes block, because if i so, it's majorly unsatisfactory as you may have guessed, and it makes me feel empty inside; like the shell of hermit crab once the crab has departed, or the shell of a snail after it's been long dead.
it's frustrating, it's almost as if it's come to a standstill and i'm waiting for the traffic light to turn green, but it never turns that way, instead it merelt flickers from red to orange, taunting my need to write with my lack of ideas.
Wednesday, 9 March 2011
Tuesday, 8 February 2011
I am extremely content right now, far more so than I have been in a long, long time. I love this feeling, it's one of the most beautiful feelings ever to be felt. You feel almost as if you're all powerful and everyone is your friend, as if nothing can harm you. Everything appears beautiful, dawn with the birds singing and the sun today which shone so brilliantly warming up your legs. Cigarettes in the sunlight, somewhat far more satisfying than a dreary, grey day. The smoke swirling and conversing with the light, almost dancing together. And then the night time, drawing you with it's mysteriously dark setting, and the lights of the city reflecting and twinkling upon the river Thames.
Velvet Underground are playing in the background, a perfect mood setter with its nostalgic sense and experimental vibe to mirror the mood I'm in, neither over loud nor in your face. Not melancholy, relaxed and harmonious to my ears, a perfect blend for my mood.
Velvet Underground are playing in the background, a perfect mood setter with its nostalgic sense and experimental vibe to mirror the mood I'm in, neither over loud nor in your face. Not melancholy, relaxed and harmonious to my ears, a perfect blend for my mood.
Sunday, 16 January 2011
In response to Charlotte Bronte upon Pride and Prejudice(actually college work)
Why do you like Miss Austen so very much? I am puzzled on that point... I had not seen "Pride and Prejudice," till I read that sentence of yours, and then I got the book. And what did I find? An accurate daguerreotyped portrait of a common-place face; a carefully fenced, highly cultivated garden, with neat borders and delicate flowers; but no glance of a bright, vivid physiognomy, no open country, no fresh air, no blue hill, no bonny beck. I should hardly like to live with her ladies and gentlemen, in their elegant but confined houses. - Charlotte Bronte
When I was first confronted with this quote, I had to agree with Charlotte Bronte's quote seeing as I would hardly call myself the biggest fan of Pride and
Prejudice. Charlotte Bronte's comment upon how she would "hardly like to live with her ladies and gentlemen, in their elegant but confined houses", struck a chord with me. I believe it was commenting on perhaps on the surface about the shallowness of the society of which Jane Austen wrote about but also the context of the book itself, which is centred upon one certain type of society, but with absolutely nothing to say about that society itself, merely the persistent and almost idiotic view of the mother and sisters who so eagerly await to be married off like cattle so as to remain socially acceptable and not to be ostracised from their society because an unmarried daughter was seen to be unacceptable.
Austen according to some has created a character that is still a feminist, I however disagree while to a certain extent she does refuse the marriage of Mr Collins, she obsesses over Mr Darcy. Austen also portrays the male and female characters to fit into a certain stereotype of how men and woman should behave, rather than commenting upon this she merely bows down to the patriarchal view of society, idealising the roles of women which were held up back in her time. Women playing the role of housekeeper, who should stay at home and be seen and not heard. Although Elizabeth does slightly challenge this, it is not enough to outweigh the anti-feminists message of the book Austen writes, instead leaving the men to make the decisions such as when her uncle is forced to travel all the way down to London to "fix" the situation of Lydia and Wickham.
As Bronte also suggests, Austen has merely taken a photography of what her society was like, it doesn't show thought beyond that photo. It shows the neatness and supposed civility of the a society focused around men, and marrying women off for money. I found the book itself has nothing to truly say neither historically nor socially with the characters focused more upon men, marriage and money and how they seemed to be the most important things in their lives, also another anti-feminist portrayal of women. Just as Bronte says they live "in their elegant but confined houses." Confined both in the way that they feel they have to act to be accepted but also in their views and beliefs of the way in which people should be treated, especially women.
The characters themselves have no sustenance to them and instead are fickle characters, swaying one way to the next. We cannot learn to become attaached to them because none have appealing characteristics nor do we learn an awful lot about them in order to become closer to them. Just as Bronte uses the word neat, it could almost be interepreted as while a neat accurate picture perhaps of what middle class was like, it is a cold, emtionless one. Darcy and Elizabeth's love for eachother is only ignited at the end, and you can hardly used the word ignited. It is almost as if it simply exists for the end of the book rather than because it is true love. As we know Jane Austen was never married and believe her books to be a creation of her imagination, of the loves she never could of had and an escape from her own dreary and lonely existence.
Mark Twain is quoted as saying "Classic' - a book which people praise and don't read." I believe this was the case with Austen's book that 300 years or so later it is merely celebrated because it has been deemed a classic and was written at a time when women were not allowed write.
When I was first confronted with this quote, I had to agree with Charlotte Bronte's quote seeing as I would hardly call myself the biggest fan of Pride and
Prejudice. Charlotte Bronte's comment upon how she would "hardly like to live with her ladies and gentlemen, in their elegant but confined houses", struck a chord with me. I believe it was commenting on perhaps on the surface about the shallowness of the society of which Jane Austen wrote about but also the context of the book itself, which is centred upon one certain type of society, but with absolutely nothing to say about that society itself, merely the persistent and almost idiotic view of the mother and sisters who so eagerly await to be married off like cattle so as to remain socially acceptable and not to be ostracised from their society because an unmarried daughter was seen to be unacceptable.
Austen according to some has created a character that is still a feminist, I however disagree while to a certain extent she does refuse the marriage of Mr Collins, she obsesses over Mr Darcy. Austen also portrays the male and female characters to fit into a certain stereotype of how men and woman should behave, rather than commenting upon this she merely bows down to the patriarchal view of society, idealising the roles of women which were held up back in her time. Women playing the role of housekeeper, who should stay at home and be seen and not heard. Although Elizabeth does slightly challenge this, it is not enough to outweigh the anti-feminists message of the book Austen writes, instead leaving the men to make the decisions such as when her uncle is forced to travel all the way down to London to "fix" the situation of Lydia and Wickham.
As Bronte also suggests, Austen has merely taken a photography of what her society was like, it doesn't show thought beyond that photo. It shows the neatness and supposed civility of the a society focused around men, and marrying women off for money. I found the book itself has nothing to truly say neither historically nor socially with the characters focused more upon men, marriage and money and how they seemed to be the most important things in their lives, also another anti-feminist portrayal of women. Just as Bronte says they live "in their elegant but confined houses." Confined both in the way that they feel they have to act to be accepted but also in their views and beliefs of the way in which people should be treated, especially women.
The characters themselves have no sustenance to them and instead are fickle characters, swaying one way to the next. We cannot learn to become attaached to them because none have appealing characteristics nor do we learn an awful lot about them in order to become closer to them. Just as Bronte uses the word neat, it could almost be interepreted as while a neat accurate picture perhaps of what middle class was like, it is a cold, emtionless one. Darcy and Elizabeth's love for eachother is only ignited at the end, and you can hardly used the word ignited. It is almost as if it simply exists for the end of the book rather than because it is true love. As we know Jane Austen was never married and believe her books to be a creation of her imagination, of the loves she never could of had and an escape from her own dreary and lonely existence.
Mark Twain is quoted as saying "Classic' - a book which people praise and don't read." I believe this was the case with Austen's book that 300 years or so later it is merely celebrated because it has been deemed a classic and was written at a time when women were not allowed write.
Thursday, 13 January 2011
I am feeling a mixture of emotions
ranging from both joyful to fearful to melancholy and much more.
I suppose I am joyful, a wonderful thing has happened in the past week which I'm happy about, however I am now lying in bed pinned down by tonsillitis, what a bastard, and having been in bed for so many days as usual in my languor my mind begins to wonder and ponder about many things, especially the human race and the reasons as to why I dislike them as much as I do.
My reasonings I have concluded come from many observations, and I suppose at my inability to understand the shallowness and weakness of the human race, which I am also guilty of sharing characteristics, none of which can be helped because whether it is down to nature or nurture these traditions have long been ingrained upon us through our culture and society in which we live in. I suppose the one thing about human nature I find so difficult to grasp onto is our constant need to feel wanted and loved and by feeling so changing ourselves in order to become somone your "friends" will accept and like rather than being who you truly are, flaws and all.
And why is it that all most people want is to fall in love, get married and have children and buy a nice house? Surely that cannot be the point in living your life, yet most people you will ask that will be in their agenda at some point in their life. How is it that we have been brainwashed into believing all we want are those four things, because I'm pretty sure marrying for love wasn't always important and nor was having children, not simply for the sake of it anyway. And those who want differently are ostracized and treated as if they are scum, well excuse me for wanting to pursue my hedonsitic desires and fulfilling a life which I have truly enjoyed rather than becoming another puppet for society to control barely alive.
What about those who simply who are entirely selfish and cannot seem to be themselves and no one seems to realise how truly false they are. Human nature is an absolute mystery to me.
I suppose I am joyful, a wonderful thing has happened in the past week which I'm happy about, however I am now lying in bed pinned down by tonsillitis, what a bastard, and having been in bed for so many days as usual in my languor my mind begins to wonder and ponder about many things, especially the human race and the reasons as to why I dislike them as much as I do.
My reasonings I have concluded come from many observations, and I suppose at my inability to understand the shallowness and weakness of the human race, which I am also guilty of sharing characteristics, none of which can be helped because whether it is down to nature or nurture these traditions have long been ingrained upon us through our culture and society in which we live in. I suppose the one thing about human nature I find so difficult to grasp onto is our constant need to feel wanted and loved and by feeling so changing ourselves in order to become somone your "friends" will accept and like rather than being who you truly are, flaws and all.
And why is it that all most people want is to fall in love, get married and have children and buy a nice house? Surely that cannot be the point in living your life, yet most people you will ask that will be in their agenda at some point in their life. How is it that we have been brainwashed into believing all we want are those four things, because I'm pretty sure marrying for love wasn't always important and nor was having children, not simply for the sake of it anyway. And those who want differently are ostracized and treated as if they are scum, well excuse me for wanting to pursue my hedonsitic desires and fulfilling a life which I have truly enjoyed rather than becoming another puppet for society to control barely alive.
What about those who simply who are entirely selfish and cannot seem to be themselves and no one seems to realise how truly false they are. Human nature is an absolute mystery to me.
Friday, 17 December 2010
Fuck the System
Recently I have been thinking more and more about society as a whole, I do give credit to my sociology lessons and the issues of the raise in tuition fees making far more aware than I was before of how much I... dislike our current government. Reading through all the news reports of it astounds me to see how much information the media seems to leave out in order to portray students as those who are violent youths rather than the whole story, although it doesn't surprise me they did, it's just the amount the media does leave out which shocked me. So much for freedom of speech.
In sociology my teacher used a phrase in which we are described as "puppets on a string" being manipulated by all the powerful social institutions, such as the government in order to all control us, and force us into conforming. I believe that we have no free will, they've conditioned everyone to believe we all have a choice and that the choice we happen to be making is our own, yet how can we be certain? We are all shaped by society, even those who rebel have been shaped to want to go against anything that is seen to be conformist in order not to. So how do we know what we truly want? And why is it we are enabling these institutions to spoon feed us all this capitalist bullshit? In today's society we are taught to believe we have more freedom than ever before, but everything we do, the choices we make have all been influenced by the system we all live by.
If I have to be shaped by society I'll be taking the rebellious road, at least in that sense I won't feel like another mindless robot bowing down to this countries capitalist situation.
In sociology my teacher used a phrase in which we are described as "puppets on a string" being manipulated by all the powerful social institutions, such as the government in order to all control us, and force us into conforming. I believe that we have no free will, they've conditioned everyone to believe we all have a choice and that the choice we happen to be making is our own, yet how can we be certain? We are all shaped by society, even those who rebel have been shaped to want to go against anything that is seen to be conformist in order not to. So how do we know what we truly want? And why is it we are enabling these institutions to spoon feed us all this capitalist bullshit? In today's society we are taught to believe we have more freedom than ever before, but everything we do, the choices we make have all been influenced by the system we all live by.
If I have to be shaped by society I'll be taking the rebellious road, at least in that sense I won't feel like another mindless robot bowing down to this countries capitalist situation.
Wednesday, 1 December 2010
 |
| Me :) |
Yesterday was the third of the many more student protests, and I'm extremely proud to say that I've been to every single one! The police were ridiculously violent, and for the first couple of hours the protest split up in order t avoid being kettled! It was hilarious!
Towards the end though it was starting to get more and more violent with one girl being beaten and having to be hospitalised! It was an utter disgrace, I ended up in A and E with a deep cut on my finger, almost cutting the tendon! Ahh but despite that I really enjoyed myself, it feels lovely to be able to at least try and stand up for my rights! Quite a few photo's of me scattered arounf on Flickr and I was on BBC news, screaming at the police "SHAME ON YOU!"
We have to fight to win this, I won't be intimidated by the police's brutality!
Sunday, 21 November 2010
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